Changing Plans

I never want to be the girlfriend that makes her man change his plans because of her but I am starting to feel like I am one of those. I honestly don’t want him to change his plans because of me. If he has plans, keep them. Especially if they are with family. It makes me feel really bad when I ruin a plan and I feel that I am being selfish. I told him, I don’t want his family to feel like they need to change plans with him because of me. I don’t like it. Keep the plans. Who cares if I’m around all the time. Sometimes I like to come over here because I feel I have a safe place to think. A safe place to disconnect. A safe place where I don’t have to think about responsibilities. A place where I can sit in my own little world and think. A place where I can do my homework, free of distractions. At home I have to deal with everything, with problems, with distractions, with life. A lot of times I think it’s time for me to move out and find my own place. The thing that keeps me at home is my dad. I would have probably left a long time ago if it wasn’t for him. I tasted that freedom when I was in Jersey. It was magical. I could what I want whenever I wanted and I had no one to answer to. I definitely miss that freedom. Maybe someday soon I will leave home. Not on bad terms of course, on good terms. It will finally be that time for me to leave. To say goodbye to my old life and to start a new one.